Social Media: We’re beginning to lose ourselves. We’re beginning to lose our minds. How important is sanity?

‘‘It’s strange that in an age when we are more connected than ever, entitlement seems to be at an all time high. Something about recent technology seems to allow our insecurities to run amok like never before. The more freedom we’re given to express ourselves, the more we want to be free of having to deal with anyone who may disagree with us or upset us.’’ – A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life, Mark Manson. 


We’re beginning to lose ourselves. We’re beginning to lose our minds. How important is sanity?

With the rise of social media, the constant need to impress those around us, the attitude of “money over everything” – are we forgetting what’s really important ?

Life wasn’t always iPhones and Hashtags. I’m sure that’s something we’re all aware of. But have you ever wondered why there is a huge rise in mental health problems in young people today? Did you know that 
rates of depression in teenagers have escalated in the last 25 years?
The quality of life has definitely seen improvements with decreases in teens smoking, drinking, taking drugs and unexpected/underage pregnancies, so why is it that rates of anxiety and depression have increased by 70% in the last 25 years?

What’s changed? The answer to that question, is of course –  a lot.

‘‘School counsellors note that more students than ever are exhibiting severe signs of emotional distress over what are otherwise run-of-the-mill daily college experiences, such as an argument with a roommate, or getting a low grade in class’’

With the rise of all digital platforms, whether that’s social media or online news- information has never been so easy to access. But, perhaps there is an argument that the Internet and social media, are giving off some unintentional side effects. 

Expressing yourself online is easy. You can be who you want and say what you want. We’re always told that talking to someone, will effectively put you on the right path to getting better or solving a problem. I agree with this, however with the ease of sharing your thoughts and feelings online, maybe it is destroying the purpose of thinking out loud. Some people may argue that that is still a form of communication and it shouldn’t be put to blame; however can you hear and understand pain and distress, reading someone’s Whatsapp message? Can you believe with your heart, that smile on your best friend’s face is real, when you’re looking at her latest Instagram post? 

We’re now exposed to other people’s viewpoints, and sometimes we may feel like we are pressured to be a part of a crowd. How often do you feel disheartened about yourself after reading a tweet, that may have gotten you ‘triggered’. Yes, there is a place for fun and making jokes, but there is also getting personal and affecting someone’s mental health for the worst.

There has in fact been scientific links made with social media usage and depression. Do you ever just ‘ghost’ and become inactive on all your social media profiles and feel lighter by the end of it? Maybe we should all be encouraging each other to do the same. Not everything is social media, someone online shouldn’t have the power to affect you. There is a lot more to life than what is behind a screen. Get out there, travel and talk to people. Let your phone die sometimes and lose a few followers – who cares?! Look after yourself first.

“A woman with a voice is, by definition, a strong woman.”

They look at us like we’re smaller than them and somewhat inferior.

We are weak and easy to break and that’s how they take advantage of us.

Our tears are what makes them winners and our weakness gives them strength.

We are only here to benefit them because without man we wouldn’t be a woman.

We are not here to be leaders. Our opinions don’t count as long as they conflict with theirs.

But they don’t take into account our power and our enduring hearts.

They would never survive with someone like them.

They would never cope with the load we can take on.

We’re stronger and better because we are survivors.

Survivor – a person who copes well with difficulties in their life.

We’re fighters.

Fighter – a person with the will, courage, determination, and ability. 

Men bring us down, but yes they can also help bring us up.

But our courage, and our strength. That comes from us and only us.

It comes from our hearts. Our courage and our determination.

We are women.

And we are empowered to be the best we can possibly be and that’s better than any man tells us we are.

Don’t stop fighting. Don’t be bought down.

Don’t let anyone tell you who you are.

Remember who we are collectively.

And we are as strong as we allow ourselves to be.

Re-evaluation 

You can’t be hurt by the receptive actions of others if you were the one who hurt them in the first place.

You don’t get to make others feel guilty, just because they feel something you don’t agree with.

How comes you can lead the life you want but if someone does something as half as bad as you, you’re not a hypocrite because that’s your life.

Who made you the judge of what’s right and wrong, when you’ve made so many wrongs, it’s outweighing the right.

You don’t get to tell others what to do if you don’t listen to what they want you to do.

You cannot demand respect without equally giving the same respect out.

You want people to understand you, but you don’t let them in over your egotistical walls.

Your actions cause bitter dissension and you’re confused by everyone’s lack of care to your well-being.

They don’t want you to feel alienated. But if you estrange yourself from the crowd, how are you supposed to feel part of it.

You cause discomfort and grief whilst pleading for happiness. But who allowed you to bring down others while you search for yours.

Whether you believe in a greater force or not, you’re still not the King of the World. You’re just another freckle of dust amongst everyone else.

Treat others how you want to be treated. You reflect those around you and those who look up to you as an example. And believe me, there is always someone.

Feel confident and feel great. But make those around you feel the same way. Trust someone, if your heart breaks; it’s okay it will mend …eventually. Learn, laugh and love.

Stop being mad at everyone and just live. Let others live too. Be happy and make someone else happy.

Why? Just because.

“Blood is thicker than water”

I dunno… I never really used to have much belief in the title of my blog, however, this year has taught me differently.

Without going into too much detail, this year has been one fucking roller-coaster. Seeing as we’re going into 2016 next week, I was just thinking. Today is Christmas – “yeah Simran we know”. Christmas isn’t celebrated by everyone but I’m sure everyone can appreciate the festive atmosphere of today which we all love.

Some of us have lost people close to our hearts.

Whether that’s by passing or just life. So days like this can be hard. Despite this we carry on with our day; we open presents, watch Home and Alone, carve Turkey, then later become a turkey, and of course, spend time with our loved ones.

I look back at everything this year and it hurts because I’m sure I felt every emotion you could possibly feel, and I felt it raw. Why? Cause love hurts.

Love requires sacrifice and patience.

That’s what family does for you. I realized this recently and I am so grateful because I wouldn’t be here with my life back in my own control.

Something which is important to me is my friends. Because even though we’re not blood-related we are family.

You may argue with your family every day, some families can be so shit sometimes to be honest, they don’t understand certain things and they don’t really know how to be there for you at times. But at the end of the day, the fact they stick by you when they’re not understanding of you when you’re lashing out in anger at them because of your own mistakes, shows you, that sometimes don’t even need them things that family never leave your side.

Sometimes all you need is to feel you have people on your side, cause loneliness is a losing game. You always need people by your side, especially in the world we live in.

 

 

Love yourself

One day, whether you are 14, 28 or 65 – you will stumble upon someone who will start a fire in you that cannot die. However, the saddest, most awful truth you will ever come to find — they are not always with whom we spend our lives.

I came across this quote and it got me thinking. Ok yes, it kinda killed my hopes of the having the fairytale dream that I wish for by the time I’m like 21, (Prince Charming, happily ever afters, and everything) but it also helped me gain some perspective.

I am a Pisces, which is a water sign. It means I am free-spirited and I love to dream. My emotions are literally always all over the place and when I feel something, whether it’s love or hate, I feel it with a passion. Not everyone is similar in that sense individually but everyone at some point experiences strong feelings.

Everyone also has experiences of love. Some people love food, some love money, some love family, friends and some fall in love. I’m saying some but let’s face it, it’s each and every one of us.

We like to blame loads of things for the root of all of our problems (people, religion, our situations) however sometimes I believe that if you think about it -we are the cause of most of our own problems. Someone once told me that you shouldn’t let the things you cant control bring you down. Loving someone or something deep enough ignites the fire in you to fight and sometimes fighting can get you into bad situations.

A lot of the time, I’m told I put everyone else’s happiness before mine and then wonder why I get upset so easily. But I’ve realized that I should mirror all the love that I put into all of my passions and all the people I love; into myself. Your ability to love yourself depends on your ability to love others, whilst if you love yourself, you will have a greater ability to also love others.

You cannot separate the love for yourself from the love for others.

Hopefully, I can now practice what I preach.  

People of the big, bad world

Have you ever just met a person during your day, had the most interesting conversation with them, and then never ever seen them again? I’m pretty sure that most people have experienced something of this sort- if you haven’t then your probably one of them people who don’t interact much with other humans- but that’s okay, everyone is free to be as they wish.

Anyway back to the point. I find it so intriguing how sometimes, people can be placed into your life whether it’s for 20 minutes or 20 years, just for you to gain some knowledge and perhaps further learn a lesson or two. Whether you are a believer in God or not, it is certainly inevitable that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes that reason may be as small as just a greater force helping you to feel better- if you’re feeling low about yourself. Or even make you feel bad about something when your confidence levels are a bit too high and you need to be bought down so you can be a bit more humble.

Let’s face it, we all have good and bad days and sometimes its difficult to see the bad in yourself, and even more difficult to accept the bad in yourself. Although what I see the majority of the time, which is somewhat quite upsetting, is people who are unable to see the good in themselves. Therefore the point I am trying to make from the point which I made from before, is that…

We should always be appreciative of the smaller things in life. 
It sounds like a right bloody cheesy cliche, I know. But sometimes the cringy cliche’s in life are actually kinda constructively favorable.